It’s one of the 3 biggest complaints I hear from parents: “My child won’t get to his homework, or finish it, or it takes FOREVER.”
I’m sure it won’t take much for you to remember why you didn’t want to do yours, either. It’s not fun. Plain and simple- it’s just not fun. Your child has been at school all day, now they get to have more of the same at home, in their sanctuary and refuge (brother, will it ever end?)
Probably not. A wise man in one of my California workshops pointed out that homework never ends. As you mentally trace your own adult life, how much homework do you think you have? When you add it up, it’s quite a lot: bills, bank statements, IRS forms, applications to fill out, calls to return, emails to answer. I don’t want to depress you, but it’s a fact of life. Homework never goes away. So even though we hate it, handling it is a life skill your child will need to succeed.
So how do we make peace with the beast? Since it is no fun, let me give you some tips over this next series of articles to at least bring it a little further up the fun meter. Here’s today’s tip:
Make a welcoming, comfortable place for your child to do their homework. I do not recommend sticking your child in their room to do their homework. Even though this may seem counter-intuitive, what would you do if you were left alone in your room with all your cool stuff? I know what I’d do- I’d be playing, drawing pictures on the windows, ANYTHING but homework!
Create a nice, quiet corner, somewhere outside their room, where they can nestle in and GET IT DONE. Give them a special lamp with good light. Let them decorate this cubby the way they want. Maybe they want to draw something for the wall and hang it up. Give them a sense of pride and nurturing in this special spot.
If a corner is not available, then the kitchen table will do. (This is a good time to train others that this is a quiet time- more on this in the series.)
Equip their special homework place with all the erasable pens, sharpened pencils, erasers, rulers, crayons and fresh paper needed to feel well-stocked and taken care of. School is your child’s career for now. Teach him or her to take pride (another how-to tip coming later) in their work. Keep this area clean, neat and tidy and keep supplies in a caddy that can be removed for meal times.
Another nurturing idea is to just ask your child where at the table that they’d like to be their ‘spot.’ This means a lot to them- your son or daughter will feel some ownership in the location. Encourage them to move from place to place until they find the one that feels just right, like Goldilocks.
You can even construct cardboard walls that sit on the table, like a study carrel in the library, so they feel less distracted.
Want to learn how to be Your Child’s Best Homework Coach? This is one of the amazing classes I teach in The Closeness You Crave: How to Raise Responsible Kids Who Connect with You! You can check it out at www.ClosenessYouCrave.com.
Until next time, have a blast in your Greatest Job on Earth!
-Lorraine
Send your questions and comments to: lorraine@lorrainepursell.com with ‘Evolving Parent’ in the subject, or to P.O. Box 555, Honaunau, Hawai’i 96726. Thank you!
Since 1995, Lorraine Pursell, family counselor and educational therapist, has empowered thousands of parents, kids and educators. To raise responsible kids who connect with you, go to www.ClosenessYouCrave.com. Claim your FR*EE monthly ‘Parent Empowerment 3-Pack’ at www.LorrainePursell.com.
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